IF ONLY THE magic and wonder of Christmas would last all-year round. The season seems to inspire people to put their cynicism and skepticism temporarily to one side. Where else but Milton Keynes would you celebrate Christmas with an Alien and UFO Parade?
When I do my Christmas shopping, I generally to try to avoid the chain-shops and mega-stores (but it can’t always be helped) because you never know quite what delights you might find.
This year I’ve come across a couple of fascinating curiosities for sale, right here in Milton Keynes…
The first is this genuine antique vampire hunting kit, a snip at £25. It contains a crucifix, a mallet, some holy water, holy oil, holy soil from Jerusalem, a wooden stake, a mallet and rosary beads. Perfect for keeping Nosferatu from the door on these long winter nights. Sadly, I don’t know of many places in and around Milton Keynes where vampires are much of a problem, so I resited the urge to buy this.
The second item which tickled my fancy was this Victorian-era fairy catching kit. I think it rather cruel to confine those mischievous little sprites in glass jars, however, so likewise I left this in the shop too.*
But of course if you’re looking for something a little bit different, you could always pop into Waterstones in the City Centre to buy a copy of my book, which is prominently on display and difficult to miss. Or if you really can’t be bothered to sit in traffic and pay for parking, you could order it online.
THERE ARE THOSE who can’t quite work out if this site is serious, or a bit tongue in cheek.
I simply present the facts – all of which can be verified independently should you be so inclined to follow the evidence. The interpretation of these facts is entirely down to you.
Take, for example, the Crownhill Estate in Milton Keynes. Every road in Crownhill is named after a famous showbiz entertainer who has fallen victim to an Illuminati hit-squad. Examine a map.
Having knocked off their famous victims, the shadowy occult group of conspiractors then conducted various ham-fisted cover-ups in an attempt to pass off their handiwork as simple cases of rock-and-rock excess. Look at the names: Monroe, Morrison, Presley (etc)….just Google any one of the Crownhill street names in conjunction with the word ‘Illuminati‘ and you’ll see for yourself. Questions surround the lives and deaths of every one of them. Quite why they were murdered is a matter of some considerable speculation: perhaps they were Mind-Slaves who broke their programming. Perhaps they were considered to be unduly disruptive elements whose influence made the populace difficult to control.
Whilst you’re on ‘Google Maps’, why not check out the various street layouts across the city?(Grange Farm is pictured).
Even the initials ’MK‘ have, themselves, long aroused the suspicion of most dedicated conspiracy theorists, not least for being so intricately linked with the top secret mind-control programmes of the late 1960s.
Sensible Cynical souls declare such coincidences to be meaningless. Perhaps they are. But over time – a pattern certainly seems to emerge.
Tears in my eyes…tongue-in-cheek indeed!
Do you really think I believe all this?
HAUNTED HOUSES can be found all over Milton Keynes. The Cross Keys pub, established in 1560, is just one of many such creepy venues.
Located in Woolstone – at the heart of the city – the thatched inn has a rich history of supernatural activity. Disembodied footsteps have been heard moving accross the ceiling, and cold hands have been known to push unsuspecting customers and staff from behind.
Earlier this year the bar maid – one Laurie-Lee Price – was working alone behind the bar when she observed the ghostly figure of grey man glide up the stairs from the cellar. She reported that the eerie spectre looked straight at her, before walking off towards the restaurant.
Her scary encounter was later reported in the local press: the article and accompanying slideshow can be seen here.
My book reveals details of many other well known hauntings and ghosts throughout the city.
AS ALL REGULAR readers will know by now, much odd-ness abounds within the city of Milton Keynes. People from all around the world have been researching the myriad strange occurrences for many years.
Here are three little known but particularly dubious
facts urban legends associated with the fine city.
- According to the Wordsworth Book of Urban Legend, the founding settlements of Milton Keynes owe their exsitence to Queen Victoria’s need for a comfortable poo. That’s right. Apparently she was not in favour of lavatories on trains, hence it was necessary to ensure there were suitably spaced halts along the route of any royal progress. Thus - when Queen Victoria needed to visit the West Country, a train station had to be built at an appropriate juncture – namely Woburn Sands. Following the building of said station, this once empty region of North Buckinghamshire grew steadily as the railway age progressed. Eventually - perhaps in recognition of valuable service to the Queen’s bowels – Milton Keynes became the official home for the Royal Train itself, the illustrious wagon being housed at Wolverton.
- On a less controversial note, it has been reported that the Milton Keynes Snowdome is visible from the moon (it’s not).
- And finally, to one of the most audacious urban legends of modern times. In the mid-1990s the global media was rapt by the ‘leak’ of the now-infamous Alien Autopsy footage which had supposedly been shot in the aftermath of the 1947 Roswell incident (and which inspired the 2006 movie starring Ant & Dec). Sadly, this too-good-to-true revelation was later revealed to be a hoax perpetrated by two businessmen named Keith Bateman and Andy Price-Watts who based their whole enterprise in - yes you’ve guessed it – Milton Keynes.
Let nobody tell you this is a city without a soul.
WHAT IS IT about Milton Keynes that the UFOs and aliens find so appealing? Do the grid roads, stone circles, pyramids and other curious features somehow allow them to calibrate their navigational equipment, or recharge their mysterious energy? Know one knows. What is for sure, though, is that they’ve been visiting for a long time. And they show no sign of stopping.
This website documents UFO sightings which have been officially recorded by police officers in the UK. And if you scroll down to ’1982′ there is, of course, a report from Milton Keynes’ finest. It would appear that at 0435 hours on the 25th March 1982 Sergeant Ivan Victory and PC Anthony Underwood driving their marked police car along Saxon Street in Milton Keynes when they observed a yellow lozenge shaped UFO in the sky. They stopped their car and watched as it passed overhead. They observed red and blue flashing lights on the craft. Astounded at what they had seen, they passed details to the Ministry of Defence – who conducted their own investigation into the sighting. The Milton Keynes Police Superintendent, one John Burton, was quoted as saying:-
“These are two experienced officers and I have no reason to doubt their integrity.”
With thanks once again to Robert Rusin for the above picture.
MILTON KEYNES is renowned for it’s UFO activity, with more and more flying saucers being spotted every day. The above map, created by the talented Robert Rusin is based upon many of the unexplained sightings of the past few years.
But this is not a new phenomenon: UFOs have been visiting the city for decades. One such incident, which has only just been revealed, dates back as far as 1979. Documented by the Birmingham UFO Group (or BUFOG if you prefer!), the full report can be found here. For those of you who can’t be bothered to read the whole (
lengthy detailed) report, it is summarised as follows:-
At dusk,in September 1979, ‘Sam’ left Milton Keynes College of Education – which was then situated at Wolverton Mill - and set off on his motorbike towards Haversham.
As he travelled along the Stratford Road his attention was drawn by a curiously bright star in the sky.
Half way along the Wolverton Road, Sam pulled over and noticed that the ‘star’ was now moving. The object descended rapidly until it was just 100 feet off the ground, whereupon it began to silently follow the edge of the road at a steady 5 mph. As it drew nearer, Sam observed that the UFO was enormous – about half the size of a football pitch. It was matte black in colour, and triangular shaped with rounded corners, much like a flattened cone. Sam noticed some structural lines and bumps on the surface of the UFO. A bright, golden light was emanating from four large portholes in the front of the object.
The UFO was now so close that Sam felt compelled to hide amongst some trees. The UFO passed overhead and travelled towards the M1. Suddenly, however, it came to an abrupt halt over a farm field – where it hovered for over an hour.
A week or so later Sam was again in Wolverton, this time with a group of friends. They were walking down the Stratford Road towards Stony Stratford. At about 7.30pm they were approaching the A5 when Sam noticed the same UFO hovering overheard once more. Again, it was silent, dark and menacing. It was closely followed by a second identical object, and between them they looked as if they were conducting a ‘survey’. Sam felt compelled to keep these sightings secret until May 2013.
The BUFOG have concluded that these were “genuine sightings of advanced craft, possibly of ET origin.”
For more weird stuff in the city, don’t forget to check out my book.
THERE ARE all sorts of people investigating the curiosities of Milton Keynes, everyone one of whom approaches the task from their own unique angle. If you spend long enough in the city you’ll come ghost hunters, cryptozoologists, revisionist historians, conspiracy theorists, UFO-logists, occultists and of course the sceptics. But sooner all later, they all seem to gravitate to the same conclusion….
Whichever way you look at it there is something strange afoot in the city.
This week I made the fascinating aquaintance of Sian and Jackie who have been independently revealing the unconventional quirks of Milton Keynes through the medium of dowsing. In particular they have shown how the whole city design acts as a modern temple to the sun. Their own website is still in it’s infancy, but it is an enlightening and gripping read, and offers a tantalising glimpse of more to come. Check it out here.
THIS SATURDAY (26th October) the genteel Milton Keynes town of Stony Stratford is being over run with zombies.
This month also also saw the release of a zombie movie (The Dead Inside) which was filmed in Milton Keynes.
It’s reassuring to know that a city which already boasts more than its fair share of ghosts, cryptids, conspirators, aliens and witches can now add zombies to the mix as well!
BRADWELL IS BUT one of many ancient constituent villages of Milton Keynes, early mention of which can be found in the Domesday Book.
In 1154 AD Bendictine Monks from Luffield Abbey established a Priory in Bradwell (the aptly named Bradwell Abbey). Many of the monks, including the Prior himself, later died of the Black Death. In about 1350 AD the Chapel of St Mary was erected just outside the Abbey. It was built both as a healing refuge for Pilgrims, and as a means to boost income. In 1524 AD, after four hundred years of Godly service, the Priory was sadly disolved.
Over the subsequent four hundred years the Abbey gradually fell into disrepair, collapsed and was dismantled. Eventually the Chapel of St Mary was the only remnant of this once-great ecclesiastical centre which remained standing.
Between the 16th and 18th Centuries the ruins of the Priory were used to rebuild and extend the farmhouse which sits within the grounds.
The whole site (inclusive of the remains of the Priory, the farmhouse and the Chapel of St Mary) is now purported to be haunted by a variety of eerie spectres.
The ‘grey maid’ is frequently seen in the farmhouse. She appears dressed in an old fashioned uniform, and is particularly fond of a certain bedroom. Guests to the farmhouse have reported objects being moved and clothing being packed away in the night.
Other visitors to the farmhouse have witnessed a shadowy man (normally dressed in black) passing through one of the ground floor walls. It has been suggested that a doorway once existed there, and the ghost is thought to be that of a man named William Tebbut who lived nearby in the late 1700s.
In another bedroom people frequently report being awoken by a sensation akin to an electric shock.
Hooded figures resembling monks can be seen winding their way through the grounds and around the Chapel and fishpond.
The site was bought by Milton Keynes Development Corporation in 1971, whereupon the Chapel, farmhouse and fishpond were restored. Today, this whole area is a ‘Scheduled Ancient Monument’ and is used as an Urban Studies Centre (the Milton Keynes City Discovery Centre), utilsed by both businesses and local community groups…